Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
