what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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