Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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