Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize