Need sex. Gaining weight.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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