My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!