he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
