If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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