we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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