so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
We have so much sex to catch up on
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Ladies don't puke and tell
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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