you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
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The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
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But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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