The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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