My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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