my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
