I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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