Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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