so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize