She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
she smelled like a LAN party
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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