How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
