so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
