More tranny stories later!
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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