fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
