Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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