All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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