im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
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she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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