just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
