Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
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You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
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I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
You pole danced in your parka.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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