Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
