would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
It was confusing and full of hummus
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
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