i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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