return my video game
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
