Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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