I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
