areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
