Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I believe in your delicious
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize