Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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