but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
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would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
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I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.