People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
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Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life