We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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