One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
