i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
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