So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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