how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize