no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
