I must be too annoying 4 u.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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