Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
