i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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