Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
