How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.