but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Randomize
