i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Randomize
