Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
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Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
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And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
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